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Liebster Award

Today while I was knee-deep in writing up some statistical documentation, debugging an MS Access time-out error, and seriously considering alternatives to cursors*, my telephone chimed. It was that special chime you get when someone clicks a like or comments on the blog. If you’ve got an iPhone with the WordPress app installed, you’ll know what I’m talking about. It was a like from Gabriel Penn, followed by a comment.

When I finally got a moment to actually look into my notifications in some detail, the comment said that he had nominated me for the Liebster award. I have been nominated in the past for other, similar, awards, but elected not to ‘accept’ them. In part because they have the feel of a chain letter. I’ve been considering that position lately though. I’ve come to the conclusion that, in fact, these awards do serve a purpose. First off, they offer a way for bloggers to, out of the blue, recognize others that have inspired them, informed them, or otherwise made their experience in life somehow better. Secondly, they provide a way to connect important elements of a blogger’s social network to other, disconnected parts**.

With all that in mind, I’ll accept the nomination and keep the chain going, but perhaps from a slightly different perspective. In order to ‘accept’ this nomination or award***, I’ve got to first answer some questions about myself, from http://officialgabrielpenn.wordpress.com/ here they are:

1. Why do you blog?
I started the blog because I decided to become serious about writing. I bought a new computer (Like a cheap one that is like 25% nicer than the on I had and 50% bigger), and started a blog. The blog was intended as a place to muse about the things I am learning, the problems I am having and most importantly, connect to other writers. I continue because it encourages me to write. Since I started, I went from having 2/3rds of my WIP written to now working through my first full re-write.

2. Favorite music?
90’s alternative.

3. What would be your perfect day?
My perfect day would be a day where I truly didn’t have to think or worry about work (my day job). Just for a day.

4. If you could travel anywhere, where would you go?
To take this into the realm of fiction, since it says ‘anywhere’, I’d like to visit any other planet in the universe that has an atmosphere and climate similar to Earth. Alternatively, a visit to the UK might be fun.

5. Favorite author?
This is a super difficult one. When I was younger the answer was Piers Anthony, no question. He made me love books. I’m not sure I’ve really got an overall favorite any more, at least not one author I would single out.

6. Coke or Pepsi?
I prefer Coke, but I’ll drink Pepsi without a fuss. I’m not super picky.

7. What is your favorite historical time period?
I’m fond of vikings and Alfred’s England – late 800s. That’s a pretty interesting time.

8. Read on a Kindle or paperback book?
Kindle, Paperback, Nook, audio book, whatever, it really just depends on how I can get my hands on what I want to read.

9. Who would you want with you if you were stranded on a deserted island?
My wife.

10. Favorite color?
Green.

11. What do you hope people get out of your blog?
This is a tough question. If anything, I’d hope that other writers would see the various difficulties or concerns I’m writing about and identify with them. It’s much easier to face challenges and problems when you know others are standing there with you.

So, there are my responses. Below are the nominations. Again, I’m taking a slightly different direction than intended here. I’m naming these blogs because I think others should take a look at what these folks have to say, and what they’re up to. I’m ignoring the number of followers anyone has. I find their insight helpful and their work compelling. If for some reason you’re reading my blog and haven’t seen these, go take a look.

Even though Gabriel Penn nominated me for this, I’m placing his name on my list as well. Check out what he’s up to.

1.) officialgabrielpenn.wordpress.com
2.) pisscoffeeandvinegar.wordpress.com
3.) pontiuscominius.wordpress.com
4.) wyrmflight.wordpress.com
5.) suebahr.wordpress.com
6.) dreamsandletters.wordpress.com
7.) fantasyhandbook.wordpress.com
8.) jessicamariebaumgartner.com
9.) ducksandchickens.wordpress.com

I know the rule says 11, but I ran out of folks I would put on to the short-list that I feel are really worth reading. Plus it’s late and I’m getting tired.

Finally, for those who choose to continue the chain, here are 11 questions.
1.) Why do you blog?
2.) What is one of your core values?
3.) If you could work anywhere, where would that be?
4.) If you had the opportunity to ask 1 question of any author who ever lived, who would you ask, and what would your question be?
5.) What inspires you?
6.) If you were to be remembered in the world from 1 piece of advice, what would your advice be?
7.) Favorite beverage?
8.) Do you have a favorite font?
9.) How do you deal with rejection?
10.) What is your current or most recent project?
11.) What do you hope people will get out of your blog?

* If you are even remotely curious just google T-SQL cursors. This isn’t a blog about SQL Server after all.
** I’m not going to claim to be an expert at social networking, or social networking analysis, but if you mapped out connections you would see more than one tight groups in any individual’s network that don’t connect to other groups at all, except through the root. Award posts offer a one-time connection to these disconnected parts such that they might connect.
*** I’m really sort of fuzzy on how this works, even after spending 45 seconds researching it.

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Winter is coming

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The Starks are assholes. Not because they’re all self-righteous jerks, but because I live in Alaska and their words ‘winter is coming’ has REAL meaning. Long summer days is what we get for enduring 6 months of cold, wind, snow, and darkness. This is what has kept me from converting 3 pretty good blog post ideas into actual blog posts this week. Today, I spent my entire day outside digging holes, building a shed and cooing at some goslings* that I’ll have to cull in the next couple of months. Really, I’d have liked to spent that time inside revising, and getting my WIP ready for beta readers and editors, but not really. It’s amazing out there. The temperature is just a little cool with a breeze making the physical labor that much more comfortable, and the fire-pit this evening feel cozy.

When it’s daylight almost 24 hours/day, it’s tough not to be outside basking in it and making the most of the accommodating weather. So, I’m not blogging much and not writing much, but I don’t feel bad about it. In a few months time, it’ll be blustery and anything needing to be done out of doors will be painful. That’s when I’ll be inside, aggressively plugging away at my computer, resolutely ignoring any outside chore.

* No, we didn’t name any of them Ryan, largely because goslings become geese and the humor would pass.

Photo courtesy: ME!

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I might get a lot more time to write soon – sort of.

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I had written two of these posts, one was good, and the other, well it’s this post. I want to start out by bringing your attention the the following word:

Breadwinner.

It’s a fun word, and it’s so imbued with sexism, it’s almost not worth using. All that said, its something I identify with. Why? Because I’ve spent my entire adult life earning the primary income for my family. Even holding down two jobs at one point to make it happen. I’m apparently about to lose that title. Not because my wife got a kick ass job that pays 50% more than mine, although that would be awesome, no, it’s because today my layoff notice went into the mail. I’ll be receiving it later this week. I don’t need to see it, because I know it’s coming, sort of like a letter bomb that kills slowly, starting with the soul. It’s the first time in my life I’ve been staring down the barrel of involuntary separation from a job. I’m a good worker – received awards, have real accomplishments to point at, and even manage to help my organization become more competitive, in short, I’ve done all of the right things, but I’m still looking at losing my job.

The last day of work is July 1. In theory, it’ll be a temporary shutdown* and I’ll get my job back. That’s all far from certain though. In fact, as the impacts of this shutdown start to come into focus, it’s looking increasingly like I will be among those not asked to return. Basically, I have a month in which I need to begin making plans. Do I just throw in the towel on this job and start seriously looking for another, or would it be better to hang-tight and assume cooler heads will prevail? Assuming the cooler heads will prevail I should be cheering the extra time off and pretend to be a full-time professional writer until I’m allowed to go back to work. Really though, I want to cry because we just finally got our finances in order and we won’t last a month without my paycheck. I can draw a bit of unemployment, but in order to qualify I’ve got to be actively looking for work, and in any case it won’t do much to cover the bills. What all this means is that yes, I will not be working, but I will be even less able to focus on writing because I’ll be working on getting a new job that I don’t really want. Me and some 10,000 other people will be fighting for the same couple hundred jobs that might be available elsewhere.

If the layoff is extended (or permanent), in all likelihood I won’t manage to find a new job that pays more than half of what I make now – Not that I make lot mind, it’s just that I’ll have to start over. Anytime you do that, you’re going to take a few steps back. Practically speaking though, I’ll have to take a LOT of steps back. Turns out I’m too specialized in a field that has 0 application anywhere else – I have dipped my toes into a few applicant pools only to find that my skill-set isn’t a good match for what the hiring organization is looking for.

It may be true that I have this fantasy of becoming a professional writer (by all accounts this is a long-shot, even with a shit-load of hard work), alternatively, I think it would be cool to operate a distillery (I’d like to make whiskey**). At this point an optimist would be telling me to go for it. Shoot for my dreams. I, however, am a realist***, and realistically, I need to make sure my family has food to eat, a place to sleep, and clothes to wear.

I think what all this means is that this comfortable life that we’ve built that affords me a few hours here and there to frantically chase a fairy-tale will go away. On July 2, I won’t be waking up at 9 to pour a cup of coffee and sit at my laptop to be brilliant. I’ll pour the coffee, which may or may not be mostly bourbon, then fire up my laptop to file unemployment, hone my resume, and continue the soul-crushing search for a job. I’ll also be seriously considering alternatives, some of which don’t involve remaining on our little swamp, with our chickens, ducks, geese, and children. Maybe I’ll have some luck and start a successful distillery, maybe I’ll finish a book or two and find success as a writer, or perhaps become a writer or for a game development company, then again, it’s just as likely that I’ll pull up stakes and take on a completely new adventure.

Life is full of uncertainties, setbacks, and heartbreak. For now though, I’m certain I’m going to see about a bourbon, after that, I don’t know, we’ll see.

 

* There’s even a chance things will turn around and I won’t leave at all
** That’s a whole other rant. Do you have any idea how illegal it is to make your own whiskey at home? I’ll give you a hint: If you’re thinking about making whiskey, you might be better off selling crack instead. The laws are more lenient.
*** My wife calls me a pessimist.